Katie van Schaijik

Joined: Aug. 12, 2011


Restless, melancholic soul of Irish descent. Born and raised in Connecticut, married to a Dutchman, mother of two daughters and three sons. I love books, conversation, friendship, delicious food, gardens, long walks and beautiful places. I am easily ensnared in politics and web-browsing. I crave silence, sweetness, poetry and peace. I am always wanting to write and ever-failing to write. All my hope is in God’s power and will to save; all my trust is in His promise.

Most recent posts by Katie van Schaijik:     (See all of them)

Truth and mercy in human experience

Sep. 6 at 12:36pm | Comments: 1 | Most recent comment: Sep. 11 at 5:55am

Cleaning my room today, I came upon an old journal and found this thought, from August 2005. I think it holds up. I am seeing more and more how the human idea of mercy is protection from truth. True mercy [divine mercy] is an encounter with Truth—which is extremely painful. I suppose it's what Purgatory is all about. We prefer the illusions that give us false consolations. At the time, I was in the midst of deep personal crisis...

Testing for soundness in relationships

Aug. 21 at 8:44am | Comments: 11 | Most recent comment: Aug. 28 at 11:48am

I don't know if I can call it the number one lesson of my adulthood to date, but it's up there. I have learned that individuals and groups who seem to be wonderful may actually be badly mired in dysfunction, that is to say, unsound. An unsound group or individual can't manage right interpersonal relations, just as an unsound physical structure can't support weight. No matter how noble their aim and how good and sincere their intentions, they will...

Not whether I meant to offend, but whether I did offend: that is the question

Aug. 7 at 2:28pm | Comments: 9 | Most recent comment: Aug. 16 at 6:20pm

A couple of recent articles about wrongdoing and forgiveness together with some conversations, both in person and online, have revived my ever-ready ruminating on this subject. I keep being surprised and disturbed and taken aback by how much basic misunderstanding there is out there, even among otherwise mature and thoughtful Christians. Let's take a case: person A (we'll call her Ann) is offended by person B (we'll call him Bob.) Ann says to Bob, "That offended me." And Bob responds, ...

Dietrich von Hildebrand and Victor Frankl

Aug. 4 at 10:49am | Comments: 0

Having heard somewhere that Dietrich von Hildebrand had "discovered" Victor Frankl, author of Man's Search for Meaning and founder of Logotherapy, I asked Alice von Hildebrand to tell me the story the other day. Here is her ten-minute reply. Some of her details are off. For instance, according to The Victor Frankl Institute website, he was in a concentration camp for 3, not 7 years. But the gist is true and touching. N.B. "Gogo" was von Hildebrand's nickname. Von...

Life and death in a look

Aug. 2 at 12:09pm | Comments: 1 | Most recent comment: Aug. 2 at 12:48pm

I've noticed in recent years that my favorite thinkers-about-love regularly refer to "the gaze of love." I have immediately in mind Dietrich von HIldebrand, Karol Wojtyla, Jean Vanier, and Roger Scruton. Plato, of course, called the eyes "the windows to the soul." It is in and through the eyes of someone who loves us that we feel and experience ourselves as loved, as valuable, and hence discover our reality as personal selves. Maria Fedoryka discusses the point in the talks...

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Re: "Soft Addictions"

Sep. 15 at 9:07am | see this comment in context

I've been reading a lot lately about alcoholism and related 12 step programs.

I few things stand out especially. 

1. Addictions cripplie us in our will, our moral agency. We cease to be captains of our own souls, as Oscar Wilde put it.

2. The first step of the solution is admitting that we've lost control. That is, we stop trying to succeed with will power.

3. The rest of the solution depends on three things: Asking for the grace of God and relying on, accepting the help of others, and committing ourselves to serve others in the same condition.

Look at how personalist all this is, and how like the gospel!

We are impotent to save ourselves. We have to turn to God and entrust ourselves to Him. But His way of working with us is through and with other persons, both fellow believers and unbelievers.

Persons are both individual and community. We are selves who need others, and who are called to give ourselves to others.

Seeing all this gives me hope and joy. Addictions seem to me a major modern path to redemption and reality.

Re: Dr. John Grabowski on Ephesians 5

Sep. 10 at 10:25am | see this comment in context

If you want to dispute any of those claims, be my guest. But please be clear and concrete about what you are disputing and on what grounds.

Your personal attachment to Steve Clark is irrelevant.

Your personal knowledge of the founders of covenant community is irrelevant.

Re: Dr. John Grabowski on Ephesians 5

Sep. 10 at 10:22am | see this comment in context

Here are my claims:

1) Steve Clark's teaching on marriage—specifically his teaching that God's plan for marriage is that men are to be the leaders, the governors and wives are to submit to their leadership—is out of keeping with the Church's teaching on marriage.

2) His teaching is inconsistent with the dignity of women.

3) His teaching is de-personalizing and damaging to marriages.

4) Especially when practiced in a context in which the men are submitting themselves to a lay pastoral leader, the teaching tends toward inexcusable interference with the intimacy of the marriage bond.

5) Many, many couples who tried their sincere best to live under these teachings testify that the effort was extremely damaging to their mental health and to their marriages. 

6) Many covenant community marriages ended in divorce. Many of those couple attribute the struggles in their marriage to the false teaching they received in covenant community.

7) As these problems together with others including financial impropriety and other scandals, Bishops intervened and forced changes to the CC bylaws and practices.

8) There is ample documentation available to anyone who looks for it. Lots don't look because they don't want to see.

Re: Dr. John Grabowski on Ephesians 5

Sep. 10 at 9:57am | see this comment in context

Samwise, Sep. 10 at 9:51am

I am an exception in that I know all of the founders of communities (lay and ordained)

 What difference does that make to the point at hand? None. Zero.

Re: Dr. John Grabowski on Ephesians 5

Sep. 10 at 9:56am | see this comment in context

Neither of those statements is mine or anything like mine. If you want to engage my logic, engage my logic, not charicatures of my logic.

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