Joined: Nov. 22, 2011
I’m a 28 year-old technologist working as a patent attorney in Boston. An engineer by training, I love understanding complex systems. And what is more complex than the human heart?
May. 8 at 5:06pm | Comments: 4 | Most recent comment: May. 10 at 5:12pm
Here are three fascinating TED talks on love: Helen Fisher tells us why we love and cheat Helen Fisher studies the brain in love Brené Brown: The power of vulnerability
Mar. 6 at 4:12pm | Comments: 2 | Most recent comment: Mar. 7 at 3:20pm
I was reading Fulton Sheen's "Lift Up Your Heart" the other day and came across this prophetic passage: Many people go through life defrauding themselves of anything that threatens their egregious pride. They have never either lived or loved. They love themselves, it is true—but there is no joy in throwing one’s arms around his own ego. What such people call “falling in love” is only the projection of their own ego onto someone...
Feb. 15 at 3:48pm | Comments: 6 | Most recent comment: Feb. 20 at 12:48pm
Finding a spouse is a funny sort of thing. You don't have control over it. You can only increase probabilities of it occurring, but in the end you don't get to choose the time or the hour. You don't decide to fall in love, it happens to you, and Divine Providence knows when that'll be. This is a bit at odds with the egoist-consumerist bent of our current culture -- what I want when I want it -- and can...
Jan. 19 at 2:00pm | Comments: 7 | Most recent comment: Feb. 5 at 7:36pm
I’ve asked a lot of married couples how they determined that they were right for each other. Invariably, they all give variants of the same answer: “We just knew.” If I follow up by asking, “Well, how did you just know?” they dodge by saying that “You’ll know it when you see it” or “We can’t explain, you have to experience it.” Now,...
May. 10 at 5:12pm | see this comment in context
May. 9 at 2:43pm | see this comment in context
It's certainly coming from a different (somewhat reductionist) perspective than personalist philosophy, but it's interesting to find commonalities (e.g. the evolved complementarity of men and women) as well as understanding the underlying biomechanical processes occurring in tandem with the experience of love.
Mar. 6 at 4:11pm | see this comment in context
XKCD's Randall Munroe actually did a survey on this a couple of years back:
http://blog.xkcd.com/2010/05/03/color-survey-results/
Feb. 15 at 4:46pm | see this comment in context
As for objective measures of attractiveness, it seems men rate women most attractive when they possess a 20.85 body-mass-index and a 0.7 waist-to-hip ratio. This is pretty consistent across cultures and time periods and probably has to do with evolutionary psychology (perceptions of fertility, etc.).
Speaking from the perspective of a single young man, who wouldn't want to marry a beautiful woman? Why wouldn't you want to choose beauty? Of course beauty is important -- it's what is noticed first, and though it isn't the most important factor, it is the factor that enables all the others to be noticed at all.
I don't see myself being attracted to someone I don't perceive as beautiful.
Feb. 15 at 4:35pm | see this comment in context
This book might be an interesting read.
If you haven't watched the third video (Ms Brown's), it's well worth a watch -- different in tone from Ms Fisher's presentation and reinforcing of the necessity of vulnerability (and acknowledgment of imperfection) for authentic experiences (including love).